Looking Towards the Future

Lately, I've been catching myself mourning sin more and more often. From day to day, I find that I am actively mourning not only my own sinfulness, but as I look upon the world that we live in I am repeatedly confronted with the pride, anger, bitterness, greed, envy and lust that seems to be ever present in the world. These principalities that are in direct conflict with God (Eph 6:12) are forces that cannot be avoided and must be reckoned with, but as the rest of this passage commands, we are to arm ourselves for battle with the divine everlasting armor of God. "Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God" (Eph 6:13-17 NIV).

Even in my interactions with others, the relational brokenness that is ever pervasive cannot be avoided. Whenever I begin new friendships, this brokenness glaringly reminds me of my own awkwardness and clumsiness and lack of social graces. The part of me that forgets how to walk and talk at the same time. But, once again I am comforted by Scripture that tells me that the Holy Spirit, who lives within me (Rom 5:5) is also continually cultivating His good and righteous fruit within me. "But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. (Gal 5:22-23a NLT). It's when I forget to seek the strength and power of the Holy Spirit to help me overcome my own brokenness and the brokenness of others that I lose hope and walk around defeated and alone.

So, as this year comes to a close and we once again have before us the opportunity in the coming year to press more deeply into the passions that pulsate within us. Let us remember that through our enduring and intimate relationship with Jesus, we are empowered with what we need to persevere through the trails that lay before us as we pursue those God given yearnings within our hearts that call out to us and urge us to make an impact for the Kingdom of God. "For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love, and of self-disciple" (2 Tim 1:7) and that those who overcome are given "the right to eat from the tree of life, which is in the paradise of God" (Rev 2:7).

Here are a series of videos from MTVExit.com on Human Trafficking

TRUTH

TRAIN

SUBWAY

CRIBS

PIMP
We all would like to think that this is a tragedy that happens far, far away from our doorstep. But, in reality it is happening closer than you would probably like to believe. There are strip clubs, escort services and massage parlors in every major city, not to mention street prostitution. To be fair, not all the women or men providing these services are the victims of human trafficking, but it is safe to say that a large majority of them have been coerced and forced into the sex trade industry. But, there are many, many, many children who are being trafficked into sex slavery.

Now not everyone frequents these places. But if we bring Internet pornography into the conversation than it is safe to say that everyone who has a computer has the potential to support those who traffic human beings into sex slavery. Every time a person visits an adult website, what they are essentially doing is supporting the sex industry as a whole which includes those who are being victimized through sex slavery.

If you are struggling with sexual addiction, get some help. Do whatever it takes to break free! As long as there is a demand, the sexual exploitation of men, women and children will continue. Be part of the solution and not the problem.

But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people (Ephesians 5:3).

Constance by Mr J. Medeiros with lyrics

1st verse:
An old man vacationing, he stands patiently
Under a hotel sign that blinks vacancy
He’s thinking maybe he’s too late to make the drop off
Til a truck coming his way brakes and stops short
And now he’s out of sorts and you can see he’s sorta nervous
Walking to the passenger door to meet his ordered service
This is someone’s daughter working, blames his conscience
When the driver says “she’s my youngest, her name is Constance”
He comments “and its only 6 dollars per visit
Just don’t leave any marks on her, it hurts business”
Thought for a minute and he confessed “that’s fair”
Since it was three dollars less then his cab fare
“How old are you honey?” she says “I’m thirteen”
Her nose was runny, its raining in the Philippines
He handed over the money in a chilling scene
The truck drives off and now he’s on the hunt to kill her dreams
The sign reads no vacancy, he leads Constance to a room
He has rented for taping see,
He’s about to turn six into six thousand
And all you have to do is click on your web browser
Its not illegal to use rapin’ as a cash crop
As long as it says she’s 18 on your laptop
The sound of rain is her backdrop laying there
Like she’s waiting for somebody to say they care
While the tears of God fall down the window pane
She feels unholy like her Father doesn’t know her name

Mary Magdalene and the Woman At The Well
He knows everything that happened and in His arms she fell.

In his arms she fell
Will you stay with me

2nd verse:
He’s 21 and all alone in his household
He’s tempted by the quiet he feels and the mouse he holds
The silence of his spouse is cold
So he’s about to help that man get his six thousand gold
One click and now she’s sold
Withholding his conscience scrolling through the comments
There she is looking confident a picture of Constance
In a series of video clips, “adult content”
The title blinks in bold letters like the vacancy sign
It’s his time to go get her
It’s like his mind doesn’t know better
Her soul is crying out “let me go” but he won't let her
He got her trapped inside his media player
Held captive by his need to replay her
Its a matter of he being here and she being there
That’s why he doesn’t feel the need to care
Guilt is in the seed he bears
Spilling his shares of the profit
On a 500 million dollar market
Where children are regarded as product
And traded like stock tips
And raped for the sake of our pockets
His laptop sits like a window into Constance room
Where he exits ’cause its almost noon
And he’s expecting his wife home soon
With new clothes for the baby
She’d be angry if she saw his new lady
A thirteen year old Filipino named Constance
Trust me girl God has not forgotten

He knew Mary Magdalene and the Woman at the Well
He knows everything that happened and in His arms she fell

In his arms she fell
Will you stay with me

You'll Come by Hillsong

Living for Eternity

What does it mean to be a prophetic voice today?

What goes through your mind when you read Peter quoting Joel in Acts 2:17-21?

"'In the last days, God says, I will pour out my Spirit on all people. Your sons and daughters will prophesy, your young men will see visions, your old men will dream dreams. Even on my servants, both men and women, I will pour out my Spirit in those days, and they will prophesy. I will show wonders in the heaven above and signs on the earth below, blood and fire and billows of smoke. The sun will be turned to darkness and the moon to blood before the coming of the great and glorious day of the Lord. And everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.'"

Two questions should come to mind: 1) Are these the last days? And 2) Has God poured His Spirit on all people? More specifically, has He poured out His Spirit on this generation?

Now, if you believe that God has poured out His Spirit on all peoples and believe that this generation is included in this outpouring, than you should then also believe that we are living in the last days where all peoples will have the potential to be a prophetic voice to the world for the Kingdom of God. If you spend anytime on the Internet than you know that there are so many people out there who have something to say. Whenever I go to “You Tube” I get bombarded by video after video of people speaking up and speaking out about anything and everything. Blogging is also gaining a lot of popularity. People in this generation have a lot to say (myself included).

Now, to be honest a lot of what’s out there is just people seeking to be funny or inventive or shocking, but there are those who are genuinely sharing the passions and convictions that they hold in their hearts. If I take a step back and take a broad view of what’s going on, what all this says to me is that there are so many people out there who have the potential to be a prophetic voice for this generation. They just need to be brought into the Kingdom of God by people who have faithfully taken up the mandate made famous by Dawson Trotman, founder of the Navigators: “To know Christ and to make Him known.” These words really summarize the two greatest priorities of the Christian life: 1) to know Christ intimately and 2) to make Him know to a world that does not yet know Him. To ground these in Scripture, we can root these in the Great Commandment (Matt 22:37-39) and the Great Commission (Matt 28:19-20).

If you believe that you are a prophetic voice to the world than your focus needs to begin to change from being on yourself to towards the world around you. So this means, spending time discerning the times that we live in. Have you ever really sat down and taken a closer look at the times that we live in? Maybe it's time that you did.

Woman at the Well

Kingdom

Reality Check

The doctrine of Total Depravity is the summarization of the spiritual condition of fallen people due to the result of the original sin of Adam and Eve. Total Depravity does not mean that we are all as evil as can be, but it does mean that every inclination a person has has been polluted in some way by sin. Now the basic premise for this is that in the beginning people were meant to love God fully by worshipping and serving Him and Him alone. But, because sin has tainted every aspect of a person we are more apt to worship everything else, except God. When we think in terms of Total Depravity, we must think of it in the context of our worship and devotion of God.

What I've been challenged with recently is making the transition from understanding Total Depravity to owning my own personal depravity (how Total Depravity manifests itself in my own life). For me, it's like I'm looking at myself in a mirror where I think the reflection I'm staring at looks pretty good, but that's the lie that I want to believe. The reality of the matter is, which is far closer to the truth is that my reflection looks more like what I would see if I were staring into one of those circus mirrors. You know those mirrors that stretch and smoosh you. If, I say that I believe in Total Depravity than this is what I must accept: that I am fundamentally distorted and I live in this distortion everyday.

But, that's not the end of the story. The bible says: "For if, by the trespass of the one man [Original Sin], death reigned through that one man, how much more will those who receive God's abundant provision of grace [Salvation] and of the gift of righteousness reign in life through the one man, Jesus Christ."(Rom 5: 17). In Jesus, God has provided a way of redemption for all mankind. When I come to Jesus, I come to Him just as I am, warts and all, and He loves me just the way I am, but He loves me enough not to leave me this way. That's why the Bible also says: "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!" (2 Corinthians 5:17). Being a new creation in Christ means that the old misshapen and deformed me is being transformed day by day into something new, something beautiful, something glorious. But, I must make that conscience choice to come to Jesus just as I am and then walk with Him down this road of redemption.

Being Wounded for Jesus

Since the beginning of this year, I've been reading this daily devotional by Adolf Schlatter called Do We Know Jesus? Today on July 23rd, I was confronted with this question: "How often does love bring pain because people we would like to help do no permit themselves to be loved?" Schlatter continues on to say that "In Jesus' service one receives wounds."

If you're like me, when I think of being wounded for Jesus, I often think of being physically hurt or thoroughly slandered and belittled by someone for the name of Jesus. But, to think about being wounded for Jesus by someone who refuses to be loved has made me rethink what it truly means to love my neighbor as myself (Mark 12:31).

When I reflect back on the past five years, I can see how the Lord has been teaching and showing me what it means to truly love someone as myself. It has been a process, but I can see how the Lord has been softening my heart towards others. The more the Lord has simplified my life, the more I've been able to look past my own circumstance and see the needs of others. The less complicated my life has become, the more I've been able to make room for others by beginning new relationships and deepening others. An interesting observation in the midst of all this is that, not only has the Lord simplified and uncomplicated my life, but He has also simplified and uncomplicated my heart. There is now a spaciousness in my heart for more of the Spirit of God and His passions.

One thing that I've learned on this faith walk is that Jesus is passionate about loving people by bringing them into salvation and redeeming everything in their lives to the glory of God. So, when Jesus encounters someone who refuses to be loved, this grieves and pains Him because He knows that sin has hardened this person's heart and now holds them in bondage against receiving the love and care that they need. We have to remember that loving others is a gift from God (1 John 4:19) and that to be able to serve another is a privilege that deserves a willingness to self-sacrifice.

When someone allows you to love on them by inviting you into their lives, take a risk and love them by sharing eternity with them. There is no greater expression of love than to lay down our lives for another in order to share eternity with them (John 15:13). And when someone refuses this kind of love our hearts should be wounded and we should be deeply grieved, not because they have refused our love and our pride is hurt or because we feel insecure about our own lovableness, but because in that moment we feel what Jesus felt as He hung from the cross.

The Kingdom of God. part 1

1For we know that when this earthly tent we live in is taken down (that is, when we die and leave this earthly body), we will have a house in heaven, an eternal body made for us by God himself and not by human hands. 2We grow weary in our present bodies, and we long to put on our heavenly bodies like new clothing. 3For we will put on heavenly bodies; we will not be spirits without bodies. 4While we live in these earthly bodies, we groan and sigh, but it’s not that we want to die and get rid of these bodies that clothe us. Rather, we want to put on our new bodies so that these dying bodies will be swallowed up by life. 5God himself has prepared us for this, and as a guarantee he has given us his Holy Spirit (2 Cor 5:1-5 NLT).

I don't know about you, but I long for eternity. I long to finally be able to see God face to face (Rev 22:3-4). Sometimes, I can get so bogged down with this life that I forget that the Holy Spirit is, not only a guarantee of what's to come, but through Him I actually have a piece of eternity that dwells in me all the time. He is included as part of our inheritance in Christ (Eph 1:14). We must never forget that the life of the Spirit is eternal life. The Spirit of the living God knows no other way to live, but eternally. How much of your everyday are you actually living the life of Heaven?

If you're like me, than the answer to that question is pretty obvious. "Not as much as I would like." But, could there be any other answer? Probably not. Now the more I think about it, the more I think we need a different question, one that gets more to the heart of the original question which is in essence, How much of the Kingdom of God are you experiencing in your everyday life?

Yes, it is true, that the fullness of life that Jesus promises us (John 10:10) that believers experience is only in part (1 Cor 13:12) because it is only at Jesus' Second Coming will the Kingdom of God be fully realized where, as Paul says, we will put on our "heavenly bodies." But, believers must never forget that we can and do experience eternity in the here and now. Though it is but a taste, it is still a taste of God's Kingdom (Heb 6:4-5). Remember, we as believers actually carry around the Kingdom of God within us because the Spirit of God is of the Kingdom. So maybe the better question is: How much time are you spending with the Holy Spirit throughout your day? Because it is through Him that we experience the eternal Kingdom of God. "For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking, but of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit (Rom 14:17 NIV)."

Sacred Companions

"If I am to have a place of stillness at the core of my being, it will only be because I have learned to offer hospitality to the Spirit (47)."

We live in a world that glorifies the defiled image of God in people. The more outrageous, obscene, even offensive you are, the more attention you receive, both good and bad. This world thrives on lewdness, sex sells. We live in a pornographic world where porn stars are icons and pimps and gangsters are emulated. You may think these examples are extremes, but the truthness of this reality has impact a whole generation. This world operates from a use or be used mentality, in order to get anywhere in life you have to either climb over someone or step on them. Where is the redemption in that?

If we like it or not, this defiled image is at the core of who we are, that is reality. Jesus describes this perverted core when He talks about what makes a person 'clean or unclean:" "For from within, out of men's hearts, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, greed, malice, deceit, lewdness, envy, slander, arrogance and folly (Mark 7:21-22)." But, it is exactly in this place, our sinful hearts, that we can offer hospitality to the Spirit of the living God. When a person gives their life to Jesus, the Holy Spirit takes up residence in that person's heart and begins to transform them by restoring and redeeming our defiled image. He becomes a new creation (2 Cor 5:17).

The Holy Spirit is the guarantee of our inheritance of eternal life (Eph 1:14), a deposit of what's to come (2 Cor 1:22) which is to one day be in Heaven with Jesus. The more time we spend in showing hospitality to the Holy Spirit, the more of eternity we will experience in our day to day lives. Now, in order to show hospitality to someone we need to be present with them and in order to be present with them we need to be attentive to them. So, this practice of hospitality towards the Spirit means our spirit is actively present with the Spirit's presence in our everyday lives which means we are taking the time to be attentive to Him. Because it's only when we are paying attention to the Spirit are we then able to respond to the Spirit.

God is so amazing!

The Creation story told in such an amazing way with video!

Acceptance vs. Tolerance

I've just finished the book ChurchNEXT by Eddie Gibbs (IVP, 2000). In the scope of the whole emergent/missional church movement, it was published in the beginning stages and was groundbreaking in addressing some of the ecclesial models that were in transition at the time. What was of main interest to me was his treatment of the need for apostolic leaders. Being an apostolic leaders means being missionally-minded by living and keeping in step with the Spirit (Gal 5:25), who reminds believers of Jesus' teachings (John 14:26) and leads them into all truth (John 16:13) while empowering believers (2 Tim 1:7) to continue the ongoing mission that Jesus began 2000 years ago.

"Apostolic leaders must have a profound understanding of the nature of their mission and be concerned to pursue that mission using all their God-given faculties. Yet at the same time they must remain open to the leading of the Holy Spirit, responding to course corrections and to unexpected, seemingly insurmountable obstacles - which are not always sent by Satan to frustrate progress but may be part of God's overall scheme, the complexity of which we humans cannot hope to fully understand, much less resolve (111)."

Now this mission that all believers are on needs to be confrontational, yet filled with grace and truth while focused on transformation. Living in a postmodern, even post-Christian world where truth is viewed as relative, where personal values supersede objective truth and where tolerance has seized the day, the reality of the matter is that conflict is inevitable. Now, while in the midst of this conflict, we are commanded to be lovingly accepting (Rom 14:9-13), but "The goal of acceptance is to work towards transformation, not that people should feel more comfortable about their sins (200)." This includes not only persons, but whole cultures becuase "The gospel judges each culture according to its compatibility with the focus, values and goals of the kingdom of God....There will be unfulfilled cultural aspirations that the gospel will bring to fruition. There will be demonic elements in every culture on which the gospel passes judgment (221)."

Repentance vs. Relief

The last verse of the book of Judges does a good job in summing up the book as a whole, "In those days there was no king in Israel. Everyone did what was right in his own eyes" (ESV). The Israelites are continually doing what was right in their own eyes (21:25) which to say the least seriously damaged their relationship with God. Now there comes a time when the Israelites are in over their heads (once again) and begin to cry out to God to rescue them (10:15). They even get rid of all their foreign gods (10:16). But, this seeking of God has suspicious motives and the question arises: "Is there any real repentance here or are the Israelites only seeking relief from their distress?"

When I begin seeking God for relief from distressing sin, I have to ask myself this same question: "Am I seeking relief from the consequences of my sin for my own comfort because it has made my life unmanageable or am I truly repent for it?" which provokes another question, one that more precisely targets the underlying issue: "If the sin stayed manageable would I have even sought out God?"

I'm reminded of Paul's words in 2 Corinthians 7:10 "Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death." Worldly sorrow comes when we are only sorry for the consequences of our sins or that we got caught. When we don't get our way or what we covet or are caught with our hand in the cookie jar we sink into despair, bitterness (anger), maybe even paralysis. We sink into the murky depths of self-pity because worldly sorrow is self-centered. There is no forgiveness for admittance of guilt (being caught), only confession which involves submission.

Conversely, godly sorrow happens when a person realizes what they have done is wrong (sinned) regardless of the consequences of their actions and the need to make things right. "This is godly sorrow—one that recognizes the wrong committed and then does everything within its power to repair the damage. Simply put, godly sorrow is constructive" (2 Corinthians, IVP Commentary, 1996). Godly sorrow is active and forward moving. It is others-centered which includes God. Godly sorrow must involve mourning the destructive nature of sin both towards God and towards others.

But, "only God can empower people to change their ways. Only God can save people from the way sin imprisons them and paralyzes them. Only God can help us turn away from sin and seek salvation" (1 & 2 Corinthians, Life Appl. Commentary, 1999). We live in a world that is temporal. For lasting change, for eternal change, God must be the primary mover because He alone is the eternal Creator who is the transformer of lives (2 Cor 5:17) "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!"

Soul Suffocation

When I read books like "Invisible Girls: The truth about sexual abuse," by Dr. Patti Feuereisen and read quotes like these, my heart pauses, it's like time hiccups and it feels like my soul can't breath.

"heart jumping

body shivering

fingers clutching

zippers unzipping

sanity escaping

good-bye little girl..." - a 16 year old sibling abuse survivor

"While my father was molesting me, I would look at the wallpaper with all the little fairies. I would pretend they were my friends, and that they were sprinkling fairy dust on me. I made up names for all the fairies, and I was the queen fairy, and I could protect every little girl in my world." - a 17 year old incest survivor.

"quick, call the cops

I've just been cocked blocked

Knocked out by a rock

My body was in shock

a flock of guys left me alone

coughing up a bloody song

how could I whimper without a fight

I was weak and the cuffs were too tight." - a 20 year old gang-rape survivor

"I wanted so many times to simply have faith, to give my soul over to the care of something else, someone else, because there were times when it felt too filthy for me to hold anymore. But then there was always some rule, like 'turn the other cheek' or 'forgive and forget.' Some concept of forgiveness that I couldn't even wrap my brain around. It seemed so incomprehensible. How do you 'forgive' someone for taking away your childhood, your wonder and your innocence and your 'first time' and your chance to discover yourself without dark pits and chasms opening up underneath you on the path? - a 22 year old incest survivor

It's question like these that makes me all the more grateful that because of Jesus' death, resurrection and ascension that true healing can happen; "by His wounds we are healed" (Is 53:5d).

Struggle

It's on this day that Jesus was betrayed by a friend (Judas Iscariot) and was abandoned by a friend (Peter). It's on this night that Jesus agonized over going to the cross, but it is here in the garden of Gethsemane that Calvary was won. It's when Jesus wrestled with submitting His own will and said these words, "Not my will, but what you will," Jesus resolved in His heart to fully embrace what was ahead. After this, there was no stopping Him. He was ready.

There are moments when I am confronting with this deep sadness for sin. And it's real easy for me to be overwhelmed and consumed by hopelessness. If I'm not careful, in these moments I can easily forget that God can turn anything, even the most horrendous event, and use it in a process of good. Romans 8:28 says, "And we all know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." It's in these moments that I have to ask myself, "Do I believe this?"

And if I do, I then have to ask myself, "Do I truly love God?" Jesus loved God and was called by God to change all of eternity. Jesus loves and and calls me to follow Him. Is it my love for God that drives me to follow or is it God 's love for me that is my driving force? It must be the latter because I know just how fickle and finicky my love is. I believe that when someone truly encounters the love of God that person will be changed, no ifs, ands or buts about it. God's love has a way of transforming the human heart and softening our obstinate wills (Ps 51:10).

Sometimes I can get really down on myself because I feel like I'm always wrestling with submitting my will to God. But, then I am am reminded that Jesus was human in every way, but yet was without sin (Heb 4:15) and that He also wrestled with submitting His will to God in the garden of Gethsemane. If you're like me, it's real easy to think of Jesus in superhuman ways, in ways that make Him more superhero than man. But, I don't think that's a healthy (or biblical) view of Jesus. He was human in every way, was tempted in every way that we are, so He knows of our suffering and is then able to help those who are being tempted (Heb 2:18).

It's not that we struggle, struggle is good because it shows our love for God when we do. We struggle to submit to God's will and that is a good thing. But, if you're like me, it's real easy to think that I'm such a sinner because I struggle, but that's not right either. Struggling and temptation are not sins. It's only when we stop struggling that we give into temptation and then sin. So how do I truly know that I Iove God? I know it through my struggling.

Redemptive Relationships

Friendships are important. When I think back on my life, what I remember most are the friendships that I held. Sure, I may remember certain times and places, but most of all I remember the people who shared those moments with me. When I look through the photo album in my mind that stores the snapshots of my life, I see people because all we truly have in life are our relationships.

Now if I call myself a Christian, the Bible challenges me to make all my relationships redemptive ones. What is a redemptive relationship? It's a relationship that always has eternity in view. Jesus was a man who lived his life on earth in this way. When Jesus talked to someone or touched someone he made an eternal impact on their lives. Sometimes it was for the better (those who accepted his message), but other times it was for the worse (those who rejected his message). Either way, people left Jesus changed.

Paul also knew the importance of always keeping eternity in view. He made sure all his relationships were redemptive ones. I'm reminded of Paul's friendship with Onesimus in the book of Philemon. One particular verse stands out to me: "I [Paul] am sending him [Onesimus]- who is my very heart - back to you [Philemon] (v.12)." Who's in your heart?

Paul continues on to say: "Perhaps the reason he was separated from you for a little while was that you might have him back for good— no longer as a slave, but better than a slave, as a dear brother. He is very dear to me but even dearer to you, both as a man and as a brother in the Lord (vv.15-16)." You see, because Paul always had one eye looking forward towards eternity, he saw the salvific nature of the situation and understood the redemptive role he would play in Onesimus' life. He was intentional about making his relationship with Onesimus a redemptive one.

Do you long for those who are dear to you, for those in your heart, to also be dear brothers and sisters in the Lord? I know I do. But, I also know that I need to be intentional about making all my relationships redemptive ones. It's a conscious choice that I must make everyday with every person in my life, including those whom I may only encounter for a moment.

Longing for God

There is this relentless longing in my heart which makes me ask: What am I longing for?

Now on a good day, which is a day that I had the opportunity to interact in a significant and deep way with one or two people, this longing within me actually grows. Whenever I get to really connect with others, it's in these moments that I feel their intense longing which reinforces my own longing and deepens my own hunger for God. It's at the end of these days that I can't wait to be in the presence of God. Have you ever been so hungry or thirsty for something that it was painful?

Now, it's really easy to get bogged down by our earthly cravings and we all have to contend with these types of longings. What I'm talking about are our soul cravings. What is it that your soul hungers and thirsts for?

I'm reminded of Jesus' words that "Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness for they will be filled (Matt 5:6)." Spend some time asking yourself this question: What does it mean to hunger and thirst for righteousness?

Alone with God

Since the beginning of this year, I have been making a concerted and intentional effort to give myself at least 30 minutes of face time with Jesus in the morning in prayer and worship. Before I even get out of bed, I turn the lights on, grab my bible and start reading. What I've come to realize is that there are so many things in this world that are vying for my attention and trying to pull my attention away from Jesus. If I don't start my day by connecting with Jesus in a real, deep and personal way, I've noticed that my days are much more burdensome. And the place where that happens for me is in reading God's Word.

How can I explain it? When I connect with God in the morning, I mean really connect with Him (and not just going through the motions, just to say I did it that my friends is legalism), it's like every morning God tells me that He loves me and that He'll be with me the whole day, strengthening me to resist temptation when I'm weak and helping me step out of my comfort zone in order to love somebody by being Christ to them. It's during these mornings that I get to hear that I am His beloved child with whom He is well pleased.

Every morning, I spend some time reading prayfully and canonically a psalm from books 1-3 of the book of Psalms and also a chapter from the Gospel according to Mark. On some days I'll read a little from Romans as well. I have no agenda, except to let the Word of God have its way with me, to let it do to me what it will. If I'm reading a psalm, I let the emotions of the words fill and resonate within my heart. We all have burdens that we carry, so I will oftentimes connect a current situation in my life to the psalm and let the psalm be my prayer to God.

After that, I get into the life of Jesus. I've been paying particularly close attention to Jesus actions. How He touched people. If you're like me, I have a tendency to gravitate and focus on Jesus' words (the red letters) because they are so profound and powerful. Jesus spoke to people's hearts and that truth changed them. So, most of the time, I'll just scan over the narrative sections (the black letters) making little mental notes of where Jesus is and where He's going. But, these days, I've been realizing that Jesus' compassion and humanity really shines in His actions towards people. He made it a point to touch people and allow Himself to be touched by people. I'll often imagine myself in the story, maybe as a person in the crowd tryng desperately to get a glimpse of Jesus or possibly even touch Him.

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to touch Jesus?

New Beginnings

One of the books that I'm currently reading is called "Beyond Tolerance: child pornography on the internet," by Philip Jenkins. It's both arresting and alarming. Not only am I appalled at the depth of darkness that surrounds this sexual sin, but I'm dumbfounded at the brazen arrogance that Jenkins quotes from individuals within existing message boards and chat rooms, some of whom have been actively participants in this subculture for over 20 years.

You know just reading and thinking about child abuse makes my heart ache. Now, I'm not talking figuratively here, it seriously makes my heart ache. When I read about atrocities that happen to weak and helpless people, especially children, I will literally do all I can to just let the tragedy of the news change me. I want it to change me because when it does, I know that in that moment God has shared part of His heart with mine. When I start to weep I know that it is God who has revealed to me just how much He loves and cares for them and He has given me the priveldge to love and care for them, too. When I get infuriated at the injustice I know that it is God who has revealed to me just how much He is angered by each violating act committed against each individual person and that my anger is a reflection of His anger.

God to me is always the first cause. It is in Him that new beginnings can happen. He moves and we can either react in obedience or rebellion. We can either sumbit to the reality that He is God and that He does know what's best or we can rebellion against this reality thinking that we know what's best. Where do you fit?

Only God can truly make new beginnings happen for all child abuse victims. I want those three words to sink in: child abuse victims. Think about it, these three words should never be used in the same sentence, let alone in combination to describe a group. If you ever doubt the total depravity of human beings, just think about child abuse. Not only in the sense that these child molesters are completely depraved, but that most people (including me and you) do nothing to help stop it from happening. This my friends is also evidence of total depravity: when we could care more about our own comfort while children are being sexually violated and exploited

Now I'm not saying that we all need to quit our jobs and start campaigning full-time to end child abuse and exploitation (though that would be pretty sweet). What I am saying is that instead of buying that next latte at Starbucks, maybe you could forgo a latte a week and start donating that $5 to an organization that does. If you believe that God answers prayers than pray for change. Prayer should be a no brainer when it comes to child abuse and exploitation.

Pray that God would close down child trafficking rings or child pornography websites. Pray that child predators would be put in jail. Most of all pray that all the child abuse victims (please internalize these words and let them change you) would be set free and healed. My prayer is that if you're reading this, you will begin to pray for change and new beginnings.